… ‘I’m trying to hold on,’ he shouted … or else I’m going to fall off the cliff. “Please help me up!!!”
The strange man didn’t bother to help. No one would help.
He was stuck forever, “heeeeeeeeeelp”. No one came to that place again. All that was left was his bones left in the river by the park. 200 years later his bones was lying in the dirt. Soon a person who was looking for dinosaurs fossils he found the bones of the boy and that story was past all through the world and the man sold the bones.
This story was really realistic and cool good job ryan.
Hi Ryan,
Your story is epic, even though it is just a few lines long!
Thanks for sharing.
I really liked the way you used some speech in your story.
But perhaps you could try using more speech marks.
Ariannah
Room 14
omokoroa No.1 school
I love you writing!!!!!
Oliver
Omokoroa No.1 school
New Zealand
I enjoyed reading this because of the part when the boy shouted “help!”
Elliott
Room 14
omokoroa No.1 school
I enjoyed how you made it feel like it was an actual story.
Perhaps you could try to add more descriptive words.
Bernie
Omokoroa no.1 school
I really liked the funny part where the man sold the bones.